Maybe it’s a mistake that I delayed writing this post until right now (7:20 PM, Dec. 31) because while I don’t hear fireworks yet, the neighbor’s stereo is already blasting in full volume (PARTY ROCK IS IN THE HOOOOOUSE TANAAAAAAYT). I can barely hear my own thoughts, and if you know me, I write best in a quiet environment.
I delayed writing, though, because today I finished my last Asian drama of 2012, Shut Up Flower Boy Band. Another reason why I’m only typing this down now is because I was still waiting for a year-ender idea. Last year, I had a two-part year-ender: a rundown of dramas I had watched, plus a letter to my 2012 self. Compared to 16 dramas last year, I got to watch 18 dramas this year. I’ll talk about them in a bit.
As for my letter-to-self, I read it again tonight, and I’m highlighting a few things that were realized this year, knowingly or unknowingly. If I base my satisfaction with all the hopes I wrote down for myself last year, then I’m one very, very satisfied girl.
“And if you’re smiling widely right now–in love with life and all its great possibilities, with God, with your family and friends, or with a special someone even [note: sadly wala pa. Maybe this 2013? CHOS]–I hope you would remember what you’ve gone through a year ago”
“I also hope you would let your heart heal completely first.” – Healed 101% by God’s grace!
“Grab only the opportunities that God opened for you and shut everything else that aren’t from Him.” – I did not have even the slightest bit of a hard time when it came to my first work. Praise Him!
“I hope where you are right now, you’ve already learned the art of enjoying the company of people without necessarily needing them.” – Too much detachment, but I think the Lord’s just teaching me something through this.
“Whatever your ministry may be, I pray that your relationship with God and His love for you would so overflow to these ministries and to the people you would fellowship with.” – I can only hope that this really happened in and through my life this year. And that I made Him smile this year.
“However, I doubt you’d meet him this year. Don’t worry, I’ll pray real hard with you.” – Kaya pala wala, kinontra mo agad, 2011 self Haha
When I met Kai last Dec. 22, I was able to tell her what I thought of 2012: it was full of possibilities for me, some of which I just wasted. Hands down, 2012 is my best year yet, life and career-wise, but there’s still a lot of aspects in my life that this year was not able to cover. And I have a strong feeling that this coming new year would be SO MUCH BETTER.
For that, my mantra for 2013 is this:
Seize everyday with a passion only you would understand.
As inspired by a lot of people who may or may not be cramming their year-enders like me (shoutout to Lexie, who just tweeted about cramming haha), I decided to make a bunch of lists I will now collectively call Top Five of Everything. This year was made special by the people I’ve walked and talked with, the new things I’ve ventured in, and the familiar things close to my heart. I will then close this entry with my ten faith goals for 2013, which I have now decided to make public for accountability’s sake.
Let’s get it on!
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: travel
Five: Manila Photowalk with Jem, Janna and Kai.
Four: Tagaytay overnight with Block A [Part 1 | Part 2]
Three: Immersion with Lexie, Zarah, Pia, and Alexa in Sta. Rosa, Laguna.
Two: Bicol ‘Joytrip’ with the Yangas [Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3]
One: Hot Air Balloon Fiesta in Clark Pampaga with GUIDON people [Part 1 | Part 2]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: non-2012 dramas
Five: Office Girls with Roy Qiu and Alice Ken [3 out of 5]
Four: Coffee House with Kang Ji Hwan and Park Si Yeon [4 out of 5]
Three: Dalja’s Spring with Lee Min Ki and Chae Rim [4 out of 5]
Two: Flower Boy Ramyun Shop with Jung Il Woo and Lee Chung Ah [5 out of 5]
One: City Hunter with Lee Min Ho and Park Min Young [5 out of 5]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: 2012 dramas
Five: Big with Gong Yoo and Lee Min Jung [1 out of 5]
Four: Shut Up Flower Boy Band with Sung Joon and Jo Bo Ah [4 out of 5]
Three: Queen In Hyun’s Man with Ji Hyun Woo and Yoo In Na [4 out of 5]
Two: Arang and the Magistrate with Lee Jun Ki and Shin Min Ah [5 out of 5]
One: Answer Me, 1997 with Seo In Guk and Jung Eun Ji [5 out of 5]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: non–2012 movies
Five: Catch Me, I’m In Love with Gerald Anderson and Sarah Geronimo [3 out of 5]
Four: Cyrano Dating Agency with Uhm Tae Woong and Lee Min Jung [3 out of 5]
Three: In Time with Justin Timberlake and Amanda Seyfried [4 out of 5]
Two: Battle Royale with Tatsuya Fujiwara and Aki Maeda [4 out of 5]
One: 10 Things I Hate About You with Heath Ledger and Julia Stiles [5 out of 5]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: 2012 movies
Five: Once More Heartbeat with Show Luo and Rainie Yang [4 out of 5]
Four: Introduction to Architecture with Uhm Tae Woong and Han Ga In [4 out of 5]
Three: The Hunger Games with Josh Hutcherson and Jennifer Lawrence [4 out of 5]
Two: The Mistress with John Lloyd Cruz and Bea Alonzo [4 out of 5]
One: The Dark Knight Rises with Christopher Bale and Anne Hathaway [5 out of 5]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: music
Five: Forget by Rainie Yang [4 out of 5]
Four: I Won’t Give Up by Jason Mraz [4 out of 5]
Three: Jaywalking by Sung Joon [5 out of 5]
Two: Good to Me by Planetshakers [5 out of 5]
One: When the King Meets the Queen by Show Luo and Rainie Yang [5 out of 5]
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: changes
Five: Getting my external hard drive, Tong Jia Di, because my laptop does not have enough memory for my dramas :>
Four: Getting my own room, which has always been my dream since forever.
Three: Removal of a wisdom tooth, an unexpected turn since I’ve always boasted of perfect teeth.
Two: Bangs, because when I get bored, I think of crazy things to do with my hair.
One: Permanent curls, because there has always been a curly-haired ahjumma in me.
TOP FIVE OF EVERYTHING: milestones
Five: Saving up in a bank. I’m still mastering the art of budgeting, but one of the things I’m thankful for is being able to tithe regularly now that I’m earning. I’m also saving up a bit of money because it’s never too early to save for the future🙂
Four: CRC Social Media ministry. This one’s not really an official ministry yet because we’re still starting, so we’re taking things slow, but being able to reach out a lot of people all over the globe through our church’s Facebook and Twitter accounts is something we’re thankful to technology for. This year we also began SOULDiers’ Tumblr page, and by God’s grace, 2013 will be the year we go full force on all three accounts. Keep praying with us!
Three: Moving on from a heartbreak. 2011 has been a very tough year for me, and as the year ended I declared full healing of my heart for 2012. True enough, the Lord’s love healed me completely this year, that not even a trace of what was is left. I still smile because of the memories, but I feel like I’m a totally different (better) person after everything happened. Yoon Yoon Jae (Seo In Guk) of Answer Me 1997 described my first love spot-on:
First love. The reason everyone’s first love is beautiful is not only because the love was pretty. At the time of first love, there was a youthfulness that didn’t know how to be wise, a me who was pure to the point of cruelty, and a you whose fire I couldn’t handle.
First love is reckless. Without calculating, it throws everything in with pure passion, and inevitably fails. But that’s why it’s dramatic—the reckless tales wrapped up in experiences or feelings that you can never have again.
First love is a time. Once it passes, it’s gone. Now you have to give a new love and a new time a chance. It might not be the experience or the purity of first love, but out of that scar is a love that grows and becomes a little more mature—you have to wait for an adult love. Only those who wait can dream of love.
When romance passes, life comes. Purity gets dirtied, passion freezes over, and youth turns to shrewdness as you age. That innocent era’s first love becomes fatigued and exhausted daily routine… and is why first love appears to be something that can’t be realized. Because those who succeed at realizing their first love… don’t tell you.
Two: My first job: teaching in my high school, Amazing Grace School. I still get puzzled looks whenever I tell people who are not updated with my life that I’m currently teaching. Why wouldn’t they be surprised? I graduated with a Communication degree. I pursued Journalism ever since I was still a junior in high school. I wanted to be a journalist so badly. But months before my graduation, the Lord impressed in my heart something crazy: teaching. I prayed for it, and I told Him that if things fall into place (parents’ approval, interview, teaching demo, etc.) then maybe He really wants me here. One by one, the Lord took care of everything, and now I’m just three months from finishing my stint as an Arts, Journalism and Speech teacher, and of course, as Grade 7-Matthew’s adviser. My speaking skills have tremendously improved, plus I’m given a lot of tasks that challenge the skills I acquired in college. I always say these because I believe in them with all my heart: (1) one of the things I learned from teaching is humility (2) teaching in AGS is the best first job ever.
One: Graduating on time. The Lord is so faithful in my life that I was able to graduate on time last March. You know what they say, the greatest gift our parents can give us is education. But I say it’s still up to us if we make that gift count, and I’m proud I made mine count.
The last part of this very long year-ender blog (and I’m sorry I’m only publishing it today, Jan. 1, 2013) is my ten faith goals for 2013. This is not listed in any particular order. I realized that having faith goals will better help me assess my year once I start writing my 2013 year-ender. This way, too, I rely on God more because with this I’m believing that He can do exceedingly, abundantly, far above all I can ask or think. In and through Him, and only by faith.
2013, I’m ready for you🙂
JEE’S TEN FAITH GOALS FOR 2013
- Consistently and earnestly spend my quiet time with God
- Be more prayerful
- Run regularly (at least four  times a week)
- Save up to 20k+ this year
- Stop being a complainer
- Go back to 57 kg.
- Be better in writing and photography
- Journal more often than blogging
- Learn how to drive
- Read more books and watch less dramas
…and because I really love making lists, I’m also making Monthly Goals! Here’s my five for January:
- Read and finish one book.
- Read the Bible and pray daily.
- Write one article.
- Journal at least four times a week.
- Run at least four times a week.
Here’s my Welcome, 2013! photo, and my prayer is that I may be able live up to my name (Joy) all year round. May you find joy everlasting too, dear reader!