Excuse me as I take a moment to let that sink in…
Fourth Year, Bachelor of Arts in Communication
My, how time flies. I’ve been studying in the Ateneo for four years already? Four years ago, I was just skimming through the list of Comm blocks posted online, finding out (to my dismay) that I’m not blocked with my bestfriend and her other bestfriend. It was also four years ago when a blockmate gained my trust with a small act of kindness. I was still crying over Physics and Math then. I was the freshie who called Matteo as Macci.
I remember back when me and my block still had all the time in the world to loiter around the campus, there was this one time when we were talking about Carlo and Elcee’s future kids (Bob!). We were laughing so loudly, with no care of the college world around us, when one senior came up to us:
Senior: Are you freshmen?
Block A: *silence* *someone in the group nods*
Senior: @#!%$!&*!!! We’re trying to study here and you’re very noisy! When you get to where we are, you’ll understand!
Block A: *silence* *Senior leaves, followed by silent laughter*
Oh, how clueless we were.
Will I also encounter a group of clueless freshmen? If yes, will I shout at them like that dude shouted at us? I remember when I entered sophomore year, I was laughing at practically every freshman I see. I was like “Ha ha ha who’s so clueless now?” But come to think of it, these freshmen, while they may be clueless and innocent, they actually got it right. They may not be aware of it, but I think their innocence is the best weapon when facing a new environment. Innocence resonates dependence, like how infants, in their innonence, depend on their parents in learning everything. If you’re a freshman, you should know better than act proud and all-knowing. Admit it to yourself: you need guidance. You need time. You need understanding. All of this, and you will adjust in no time.
As I enter my fourth and final year in the Ateneo, I won’t be innocently calling Matteo as Macci. I won’t be confused where the hell SEC-C is. But figuratively, there would be changes that would require adjustment to. Thesis, among others. And the very idea of being in college for one last year. It’s scary; it’s exciting; it’s all the emotions rolled together. That’s what Senior Year feels like. That’s what IV AB COM feels like.
And surprisingly, I’m excited to start my last first semester. I don’t know why. With where I am now, the natural reaction should be hating the very thought of going to school. But I’m excited. The future is uncertain, but I won’t let worry get in the way of enjoying my last year in the Ateneo. Everyday will be spent as if it were my last. I will make the most of every living, breathing moment, basking in the surrealism and realism of it all.
My last first semester would be about: thesis, guidon, the assembly, basic photography, cell groups, ministries, habit-forming, straight As, waiting, people, God.
This is it. God has taken me this far, so there’s no stopping now. Eyes on the finish line. Eyes on that Latin. Eyes on that diploma.
Eyes on the Lord, my Enabler. 🙂