And in what form will you come? A best friend? A friend? A cup of coffee? A movie? A book? A tv series? A hug? A word? A text message? A call? A chat message? A smile? A verse from the Bible? A song? A quote? A tweet? A cone of ice cream? A blog?
Because whatever/whoever/wherever you are, I sure need you. I need you badly. Words can’t even express exactly what I’m feeling. Both things just had to happen at the same freaking day. Caught off-guard? Understatement.
God meant this–all of this–for my good. I know that. I’m sure about it. It may take me a long time to comprehend, to understand, and finally, to accept, but in this time of pain, He will be more than enough for me.
I remember that article Date a Girl Who Loves Jesus. One paragraph goes:
This girl has some serious self-respect; she doesn’t parade around announcing her flaws in hopes of reassurance or compliments. She knows that she was created in His image and no matter what society says; she is beautiful. She doesn’t need anyone to remind her. She knows how intricately created she is, placing her self-worth in Christ and Christ alone.
I want to be exaclty like her. The things I’ve been holding on to…I don’t need them for self-assurance, to boost my self-worth. Through Christ I am already made worthy. Still I’m human, I guess, and I long to be loved. The wrong part, however, is when I looked for love at the wrong places when it’s obviously staring at me, right in front of my face. It’s Jesus, Love Himself, presenting Himself. He wants me to consider Him enough.
I am definitely getting there, Lord.
There may be pain for now, but the joy comes in the morning. It always does, with no fail. I just have to give it all up. Break my heart for what breaks Yours. Lead me to Your heart.
Dear Jee, please forgive yourself. See, Jesus has already forgiven you. In fact, He doesn’t even remember you sinning at all. Like He had amnesia or something. He sees in you a heart so pure, so blameless, so innocent, no matter how many flaws you have. This time is no different. Forgive yourself for doing what you want instead of what He wants. Here you go, here’s your chance. Prove Him the God of your days, the King of your nights, the Lord of your laughter, Sovereign in sorrow, the Prince of your praise, the Love of your life.
Make Him the center of your life. Anyone less means depriving yourself of a Christ-like life lived to the fullest. You want to mature in the Lord, right? Here you go. Take Him. Take all of Jesus.
To get over this, you will have to fall in love with God Himself all over again. This time, love only Him. And love Him with your whole heart.
I love you, My child, and until you discover that only in Me can your complete satisfaction be found, you will not be capable of the perfect human love that I have planned for you. You will never be totally happily united with another until you are united with me, exclusive of anyone or anything else, exclusive of any desires or longings. (Most Wonderful Love)